Flange: A Gargoyle Looks at Xmas (Part 2)

(written by human John’s co-blogger gargoyle Flj,
but please to call me Flange, how pronounced anyway)
(edited by John for clarity and, um, readability)

You already read Part 1 of this series, yes? If not, it here.

There you learned things about gargoylish Xmas decorations and such.

(Ed. note: Asides in a couple of subsequent posts added some additional factoids.*)

But that post did not explain true heart of gargoylish Xmas, just like human variety: matters of spirit.

Surprised you may be, gargoyles, hideous beasts you probably think of us, even have souls (other than spirits, evil we consume). Let alone that think about and even celebrate spiritual matters. Humans only creatures with souls, no? with theology?

But yes, is true: gargoyles spiritual too.

About Xmas, the souls of gargoyles (much cleverer than human souls) know these things:

• Son of Great Igneon not arrive on Xmas day itself, but on following Tuesday. Not actually born then, either (Son of Great Igneon “born,” like other gargoyles, when magma first solidified into stone) — that just day he and hungry retinue arrived at inn and turned away for space, lack of. Lucky for future gargoyles, the innkeeper spirit, evil, was. Ditto all existing lodgers. All rooms vacant within half-hour. Innkeeper likewise gone. Not really Xmas miracle, just appetite miracle. So Xmas day always feast day for gargoyles, over 4,000 human years, counting.
• Stars in sky, crystals of ice and snow, other sparkledots of season, all put there by Great Igneon to signify tiny crystal of gargoyle soul in center of gargoyle body. (Humans not see gargoyle soul. Humans not see many things, even when pointed out.) At Xmastime, gargoyle souls everywhere in sky and on ground and in windows and human eyes, sparkledotting, and consuming manymany spirits, evil. No wonder humans feel so mushy sentimental then: most spirits, evil, hiding away.
• When gargoyle die, usually because sloppy or malicious human knocked off bookshelf or cornice, soul sparkledot drift up to gargoyle heaven. Lose wings there, not get them. Bigbig relief to gargoyle, flexwings no more. Flexwings fun first eight millennia, after that just something to get through. (May post some day about garthritis.) No wings mean more make clicky-clicky, throes of clicky-clicky sometimes trigger by mistake flexwings, clicky-clicky not consummated. So gargoyle heaven place with much clicky-clicky, no flexwings, many smile.
• Gargoyle Xmas carols very spiritual, but sound to humans like silence. Human Paul Simon when wrote his song, sad Xmastime was. He not know what he hearing, think absence of sound but no: silence at Xmastime IS a sound — sound of gargoyle Xmas carol choruses. Closest human word for gargoyle silence is soulshade. Soulshade very comforting to gargoyle soul, like oasis. Gargoyle thirsty soul savor soulshade by gallons. Why gargoyles like night in human city more than day. Especially at Xmastime.
• At midnight on gargoyle Xmas eve, Great Igneon launches own soul sparkledot across sky. (Great Igneon only creature ever do this, everyone else die trying.) All gargoyle eyes follow path, feel tug on own soul sparkledots. Humans sometimes see Great Igneon soul sparkledot, too. Not like gargoyles’, Great Igneon’s soul sparkledot complex shape, giant shape, soaring across face of moon, color red much, white little, eight tiny sparkledots flexwing ahead and leading way. Humans think Great Igneon soul sparkledot something else, magic obese human. Other humans say those humans crazy: say, no magic obese human, nothing to see. Flj say: those see-nothing humans not crazy, just stupid or blind. So much for lords of nature.

Flj leave you now with this, which some lucky human captured one Xmastime night before gargoyle knew what happening was and froze.

__________________

* I.e.:

• “…complications abound in working on anything with a gargoyle. Communication problems, for one — we’re still getting used to each other’s language. And no computer ‘hard’ware known is meant for handling by someone with fingers of stone and eyes incapable of focusing on anything but the vague middle distance.”
• “Gargoyles celebrate Xmas for — guess what? — twelve of our days… Whole different metabolism, you know. When a gargoyle’s pulse races, it sounds like a steam engine just barely pulling out of the station: Chuff… Chuff… Chuff…”