{"id":21376,"date":"2019-08-23T06:32:57","date_gmt":"2019-08-23T10:32:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/?p=21376"},"modified":"2019-08-23T06:32:57","modified_gmt":"2019-08-23T10:32:57","slug":"working-with-what-you-didnt-expect","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/2019\/08\/working-with-what-you-didnt-expect\/","title":{"rendered":"Working With What You Didn’t Expect"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Image:<\/a><\/p>\n

[Image: Dempsey and Firpo, by George Bellows. The reason for its inclusion here will be obvious once you’ve read through this post. The fight in question is covered by Wikipedia here<\/a>.]<\/em><\/p>\n

From\u00a0whiskey river<\/em><\/a>:<\/p>\n

When you’ve lived as long as I have, you tend to think you’ve heard everything, that there’s nothing left that can shock you anymore. You grow a little complacent about your so-called knowledge of the world, and then, every once in a while, something comes along that jolts you out of your smug cocoon of superiority, that reminds you all over again that you don’t understand the first thing about life.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(Paul Auster [source<\/em><\/a>])<\/p>\n

…and not from\u00a0whiskey river<\/em>:<\/p>\n

Sunday<\/strong>
\n(excerpt)<\/em><\/p>\n

iii at the museum (bellows)<\/span>
\nFor Alexander Nemerov<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

The man in the left-hand corner<\/span>
\nof Bellows’s picture of the Dempsey-Firpo
\nfight, the picture a dream, so not a real
\nfight — a picture of a fight — his flayed hide
\njust visible under his blue pinstripes,
\nthe watcher and the fighter
\nindistinguishable, one inside<\/span><\/p>\n

the other, lion and lion tamer,
\nthe paint daubs faces or fingerprints
\nand the lights staring and staring across
\nthe fretwork of the ring, and Bellows<\/span>
\nhimself, next to him, looking surprised,
\nas if to be there was to give himself up
\nwithout our noticing it, as we all do<\/p>\n

in a gesture, or word, leaving something
\nbehind we should have taken with us
\nor even guarded, a way of not letting<\/span>
\nsomething be over and done with.
\nThe fight was over in four minutes flat.
\nA curious thing about the painting
\nis that Bellows chose to show us<\/p>\n

the moment when Firpo sent Dempsey
\ncareening, with a blow to the jaw,
\none of the two times he laid him out,
\nand we, with the spectators crammed
\ninto the foreground of the picture<\/span>
\nhave to help push Dempsey back
\ninto the ring where two-and-a-half<\/p>\n

minutes later he will defeat Firpo,
\n\"Giotto:<\/a>who went down four times to his two.
\nIn Assisi, at the Basilica di San Francesco,
\nin the panel in which Giotto depicts<\/span>
\nthe moment Francis gives away
\nhis worldly goods, the palm that Francis
\nraises up to the hand that is reaching<\/p>\n

down to him from heaven, a hand out
\nof the blue, open, ready to give or
\nreceive wonders, is the same hand
\nin Bellows’s picture raised behind Dempsey
\none wing of a dove, the impulse is<\/span>
\nto press our own palms to it, and despite
\nour better judgment to hurl him back.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(Cynthia Zarin [source<\/em><\/a>])<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

…and again from\u00a0whiskey river<\/em><\/a> (italicized passage):<\/p>\n

I am sitting at my kitchen table waiting for my lover to arrive with lettuce and tomatoes and rum and sherry wine and a big floury loaf of bread in the fading sunlight. Coffee is percolating gently, and my mood is mellow. I have been very happy lately, just wallowing in it selfishly, knowing it will not last very long, which is all the more reason to enjoy it now. I suppose life always ends badly for almost everybody. We must have long fingers and catch at whatever we can while it is passing near us.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(Tennessee Williams [source<\/em><\/a>])<\/p>\n

…and again, not:<\/p>\n

To desire in the void, to desire without any wishes. To detach our desire from all good things and to wait. Experience proves that this waiting is satisfied. it is then that we touch the absolute good.<\/p>\n

—<\/p>\n

The good seems to us as a nothingness, since there is no thing that is good. But this nothingness is not unreal. Compared with it, everything in existence is unreal.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(Simone Weil [source<\/em><\/a>])<\/p>\n

…and, for that matter:<\/p>\n

Taking that bite before leaving<\/strong><\/p>\n

I can’t remember how it started? As we strolled out of
\nthe trees and onto the savannah, did I pick it carelessly
\nas we walked hand in hand, then with my lips on yours and
\nyours groping for mine, with that hunger did I take the bite
\nright there in front of God and everybody?<\/p>\n

Or had I planned to take what was not mine?
\nIt’s been long enough that my calculations
\nare lost to me, except for this: that the deed is done.<\/p>\n

It was cold and hard, tart, dripping down my arm, such
\na fine contrast to your warm mouth on mine, right after
\nthat bite, you eating it with me, but my tooth marks on the skin.<\/p>\n

I pack and leave after that, the place lost its thrill. No more
\nthe sweet fruit of life’s tree, no longer crisp delights from
\nthe tree of the wise, I have one child after another who can’t
\nget along but still sometimes
\nI dream<\/p>\n

… we are back, we have not gone too far. We are still
\npristine. Life is easy. We have all we need.
\nWe still have the Other’s scent and luminescence.<\/p>\n

I awake
\nwith a start, and a weep, reach out for your
\nskin as I knew it then, uncovered, without all
\nthese accouterments, minus all these layers.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(Susan Baller-Shepard [source<\/em><\/a>])<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[Image: Dempsey and Firpo, by George Bellows. The reason for its inclusion here will be obvious once you’ve read through this post. The fight in question is covered by Wikipedia here.] From\u00a0whiskey river: When you’ve lived as long as I have, you tend to think you’ve heard everything, that there’s nothing left that can shock […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","h5ap_radio_sources":[],"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":3,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"anyone","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"Paul Auster, Cynthia Zarin, et al. 'Working With What You Didn't Expect'","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[247,1393,250,5,251,4159],"tags":[2880,3314,4666,4962,4963,4964],"class_list":{"0":"post-21376","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-ruminations","7":"category-whiskey-river-runningaftermyhat","8":"category-art","9":"category-06_writing","10":"category-poetry-writing_cat","11":"category-essays","12":"tag-simone-weil","13":"tag-paul-auster","14":"tag-cynthia-zarin","15":"tag-susan-baller-shepherd","16":"tag-tennessee-williams","17":"tag-george-bellows","18":"entry"},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6kZSG-5yM","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21376","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21376"}],"version-history":[{"count":18,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21376\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21395,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21376\/revisions\/21395"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21376"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21376"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21376"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}