{"id":788,"date":"2008-09-08T14:25:06","date_gmt":"2008-09-08T18:25:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/?p=788"},"modified":"2008-09-08T14:25:06","modified_gmt":"2008-09-08T18:25:06","slug":"celebrity-moments-bogus-edition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/2008\/09\/celebrity-moments-bogus-edition\/","title":{"rendered":"Celebrity Moments (Bogus Edition)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright\" title=\"A place to meet celebrities!\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/johnesimpson.com\/images\/rodeodrive_sm.jpg?resize=250%2C176&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" width=\"250\" height=\"176\" \/>I love finding new, really well-written blogs. But I don&#8217;t like using services like StumbleUpon and Technorati <em>et al.<\/em> to find them. Many of my favorites I came to almost accidentally; someone comments astutely on someone else&#8217;s blog, for example, and I follow up the link from the commenter&#8217;s name, and lo, there I find a rich verdant pasture of daily commentary and\/or howling snarkery, or whatever.<\/p>\n<p>So it was that I landed on <a title=\"Misssy's blog\" href=\"http:\/\/misssymartin.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">The Misssy M Misssives<\/a> (yes, those are triple S&#8217;s), subtitled &#8220;Stories from a <span class=\"explannote\" title=\"Scottish: 'playful' little girl\">Besom<\/span> and <span class=\"explannote\" title=\"idle or foolish and irrelevant talk\">Blether<\/span>.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>In particular, I landed there on <a title=\"Misssy: David Bowie sold me a raffle ticket\" href=\"http:\/\/misssymartin.blogspot.com\/2008\/05\/david-bowie-sold-me-raffle-ticket.html\" target=\"_blank\">a post from May<\/a>, entitled &#8220;David Bowie sold me a raffle ticket&#8221;:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>&#8230;in my life, it appears that I have met quite a few famous people. I thought I\u2019d list some of them for you for a laugh. They are all true.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><em>True<\/em>. All right then. That&#8217;s interesting. And they are funny. (Likewise all the comments, in which visitors listed their own brushes with the notable.)<\/p>\n<p>(Note, though, that not all these celebrities will be familiar, capital-N Names on this side of the Atlantic &#8212; or maybe just on this side of 40-some years of age. Like, Christopher Lee? Sure. Even Roland Gift, whose name gave me a little ego puff because I knew who he was before she said so. But &#8220;Wet Wet Wet\u2019s Marty Pellow&#8221;? Sheesh.)<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve got no &#8220;celebrity moments&#8221; to report at the moment. But I thought it might be entertaining (well, to one of us, anyhow) to riff on the idea of celebrity encounters which never actually happened&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p class=\"chapterhead\">Bumping Elbows<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>When my Dad was in the Army, he worked on a Jeep driven by <strong>Buddy Hackett<\/strong>. Buddy was so grateful to have the thing running again that he gave Dad a can of beer and a pack of smokes. Years later, we were visiting Las Vegas as a family and Dad introduced us to Buddy after his early show at The Sands casino. Buddy said &#8220;Hey, squirt&#8221; to me and tousled my hair &#8212; difficult when the touslee sports a crewcut &#8212; and then had somebody from his entourage remove us from the dressing room because, he said, he had served in an anti-aircraft unit during the war and never drove a Jeep. Dad was still laughing about that when the LVPD drove him away.<\/li>\n<li>I delivered newspapers for many years when I was a boy. One of my favorite customers was the Stapleton household, where actress-to-be <strong>Jean<\/strong> lived with her parents. I liked delivering their paper because they had lots of bushes out front and it was fun and easy to &#8220;miss&#8221; the porch. They were lousy tippers, though.<\/li>\n<li>During the Christmas shopping season in 1995, I was browsing in Saks &#8212; THE Saks store, on Fifth Avenue in NYC. (Of course I couldn&#8217;t afford to buy anything there; I&#8217;d lost my paper route the previous year and hadn&#8217;t yet found something lucrative to take its place.) <em>En route<\/em> from the second to the third floor, I was suddenly stuck on an escalator. In the ensuing panic, I almost didn&#8217;t realize that the impatient voice behind me was <strong>T\u00e9a Leoni<\/strong>&#8216;s, repeating over and over, &#8220;Excuse me. Excuse me. I&#8217;m sorry, can you step aside?&#8221;<\/li>\n<li><strong>Paul Reubens<\/strong>, a\/k\/a Pee-Wee Herman, once muscled me aside to get into a men&#8217;s room in Radio City Music Hall.<\/li>\n<li>In the late 1990s, I tried <a title=\"Wikipedia, on speed dating\" href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Speed_dating\" target=\"_blank\">speed-dating<\/a> a few times. The last time I did this was at a function held on the second floor of a firehouse in Washington, DC. I&#8217;m pretty sure two of my fellow speed-daters were <strong>Donald Rumsfeld<\/strong> and <strong>Laura Bush<\/strong>, but of course neither of them were all that prominent at the time. Laura Bush (if it was her) asked me what I thought of tatting, but it was the last question and I never got to answer before the buzzer went off. Don Rumsfeld (ditto), well, I never got to interview or be interviewed by him. It was probably just as well.<\/li>\n<li>Finally, just a few months ago, I had just finished pumping a tankful of gas at the local Circle K convenience store and was driving away. I couldn&#8217;t get a real good look at him, but I think the guy who was chasing after me to warn me about the nozzle still stuck in my gas-tank receptacle &#8212; I think that was <strong>playwright David Mamet<\/strong>. He had the right build, the right hair, and he was cussing a blue streak. And of course he was smoking his trademark cigar. But then the nozzle popped out and, well, if you read the papers you know the rest.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Yes, I&#8217;ve had an eventful, celebrity-filled life. I wouldn&#8217;t trade it for anything &#8212; not even a raffle ticket from David Bowie.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I love finding new, really well-written blogs. But I don&#8217;t like using services like StumbleUpon and Technorati et al. to find them. Many of my favorites I came to almost accidentally; someone comments astutely on someone else&#8217;s blog, for example, and I follow up the link from the commenter&#8217;s name, and lo, there I find [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","h5ap_radio_sources":[],"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":3,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"anyone","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[426,37,5],"tags":[427,428,4142],"class_list":{"0":"post-788","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-celebrities","7":"category-onlineworld","8":"category-06_writing","9":"tag-misssy-m","10":"tag-blogrolling","11":"tag-celebrities","12":"entry"},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6kZSG-cI","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/788","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=788"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/788\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":803,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/788\/revisions\/803"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=788"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=788"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/johnesimpson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=788"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}